Are You Disappointed With God?

by Andrea Onah
(Surrey, UK)

I was having a conversation not too long ago with a friend of mine.  We were going over the usual pleasantries of our plans for the weekend ahead.  My friend had been invited to a barbecue on the Sunday afternoon after church.  The hostess of the barbecue was a lady celebrating her 45th birthday.  She was a Christian.  And single. 

Miss Barbecue Hostess had decided to miss Sunday service at her local assembly in order to prepare for her day's festivity. I pondered at the extent of the preparation and how much this barbecue must mean to Miss Hostess to cause her to want to miss church purposely.

It seemed my friend must have been reading my thoughts.  Or perhaps he was concerned about his friend.  Anyhow, he somehow felt the urge to share that Hostess had become lukewarm in her walk with God.  Hostess seemed to be heading for colder spiritual climates.  

Hostess told my friend that she got to a stage in her life where frankly, she felt disappointed.  Of course, my friend did not need to spell out to me what she was disappointed about!  What with another birthday that no doubt served as nothing more than an aching reminder of her single status, one did not need to be King Solomon's clone to put two and two together. 

If some of us are honest, brutally honest in fact, many of us have or would feel the same way as Hostess.  Especially if I tell you that this lady had served God with a persistent commitment over several years. 

It is easy to  imagine her several 'marriage' prayer requests that had been offered time and time again upwards to the God she had served relentlessly.  Had the sweet smelling aroma from those requests now become stale before God?  Had God even stopped listening or become bored?

The narrative does not quite end yet.  Hostess had reached an almost fatal point in her Christianity where she now seriously questioned her faith and who God really was.  The best she could offer the God of her yesteryears, was a back seat in her life. Needless to say, I found that a bit unsettling.  For if God was at the rear seat who then was now at the front with the steering wheel? 

Like some of us at one time or the other, Hostess had 'tried' God; you know, 'given God a try'.  And like many of us have equally felt, God had not 'worked'... at least so far. 

The naked truth of the matter was Hostess was exhibiting signs of anger towards God, possibly without even realizing it.  By her actions and words she was offended with God.  After all, the Bible (Psalm 37:4) tells us when we delight ourselves in the Lord He will grant the desires of our heart.  Hostess had delighted only to find it was a one way exchange.  Apparently. 

So what are we to do when we feel God has not met His own side of the bargain?  

Uninhibited or repressed anger, being upset over an extended period, and rebellion, are all symptoms of being offended with God.  Let's not pretend, we all know people who have left church because they felt let down by God.  Worse, we know or have heard of people who have even back slidden.

Personally, I call offense a seed.  To be offended with God is a fire extinguisher to the blessings of God.  That is why we must be cautiously careful.  Offense is an expensive commodity. God, after all, is the One who blesses us.  Yes, He is merciful and will continue to bless us still, yes, but we will not be able to obtain the fullness of that blessing if we remain in a stupor of offense...

The seed of offense once germinated leads to bitterness towards God.  The Bible refers to bitterness as a root.  Roots grow downwards and are hidden below the ground.  Lets pause for a second...Something that is hidden means that it cannot be seen, right?  This makes bitterness hard to identify. 

The leaves and stems that appear above ground are usually the first indications of the condition of the root.  If the root is bad, the plant appears sickly and poorly.  The seed of offense brings forth the root of bitterness.  Bitterness is spiritual poison.  It is a serious blessing inhibitor.  The Bible says that bitterness will trouble you (Hebrews 12:15).  Oh, oh!  Bitterness is a trap from satan.

God does not and cannot move in an atmosphere of offense or bitterness, whether it is directed to others, God or even ourselves.  We must be wise and avoid getting into this enemy territory.   Giving God the silent treatment, sulk treatment or whatever treatment because we feel disappointed certainly will not work with God.  If anything it only makes matters worse for us in the long term.

The first step in ridding ourselves of our pent up anger and discontent towards God is to come to a point and conviction in our hearts where we truly understand, comprehend and have a deep revelation of the uttermost love that God has for each of us.  We must decide for ourselves that this love is limitless, bottomless and knows no bounds.  We have to consciously meditate on this love because it is our safeguard against bitterness.

Then we will find ourselves being ushered to a place where we fully and utterly trust God.  At this point, it becomes impossible to become offended with God.  Because we come to a realization within our hearts that ALL THINGS are working for our good (Romans 8:28). 

We start to experience an unspeakable joy that does not depend on circumstances.  Many times, if we are frank, we are not prepared to get to this position.  It is a choice we are sometimes reluctant to make, a choice that requires humility.  But often we find ourselves preferring to remain in our stubborn state.  Someone must take the blame for things not appearing the way we want them and that someone has to be God!   

It is imperative that we continually take heart and not give up.  Giving up will prevent us from reaching the finishing line.  Many people have given up just at the point when God was about to visit them on a particular issue.  Nothing is ever too late for God.  That recognition must be a fixation in our hearts and mind.  We must believe that even if God has never done whatever it is we are after for any person since creation began, that does not stop Him for doing it for us now. 

There are several 'firsts' in the Bible after all.  If, as humans, we strive to be the first in something such an inventor, breaking a record or being a pioneer for example, do you not think the God who created us, can do a 'first' for us?

Let us continue to delight ourselves in the Lord in spite of seemingly hopeless or desperate situations.  God's Word cannot lie.  If He says He will grant us the desire of our hearts then we must continue fulfilling our part – delighting ourselves in the Lord.  Do not be tempted to give up prematurely.  Ever!  God never gave up on you, why give up on Him?  Make peace with God and get back on track.

In previous columns I told you my personal story.  Yes, by so-called world’s standards, I was once there where the years seemed to be ascending rapidly upwards with not even Mr Almost Right in sight.  But when I poured myself into the things of God, unconditional joy began to radiate from my spirit.  I ended up having party times with the Holy Spirit to such an extent, I even began to wonder briefly at one stage if I still desired marriage. 

And what happened in the end?  Joy diffused an aroma from me that sent the right 'find me' signal!  And when my to-be husband picked up that signal, I was surely found.

What choices are you going to make today after reading this?  I sincerely hope that you will not allow bitterness to be your choice of handling disappointment.  There is hope in God.  

Delight yourself in the Lord, and He will indeed grant you the desires of your heart.  Till next time, have a joyful 'offenseless' October....!