I am beyond hopeless, yet too scared to die at my own hands. I was a sinful teen, resulting in the birth of 2 children out of marriage. Tried to make up for my sinful life by taking care of my children, being role model, and getting an education. Fought for 4-year degree and began to work and make money. A drug addicts son shot and killed my 16 year old after a school argument. Lost everything. 12 years later, fought for graduate degree, but have worked for less money than less educated and qualified peers, have been used, misused, and treated like trash by friends and family. Am now homeless and living with my mother in rural Arkansas; nothing in the town but fields and despair. No jobs in area and would have to drive miles to gain employment. Transportation is an issue. Deeply in debt and nowhere to turn. I JUST WANT TO DIE. But I have a 29 year old son and a 10 year old granddaughter who love me dearly. I can't pray anymore. I feel like a useless failure in front of my child and everyone else.
Signed, Hopeless in Arkansas
Want to give up by: Anonymous
Yes I am feeling hopeless. My daughter who has been living with us for 27 years and with our grandson for 6 years, is getting married. She told us that she is pregnant. That was 4 weeks ago. They are getting married in 1 week, moving into a house in 2 weeks. I am very much experiencing the empty nest syndrome. I feel my heart breaking. They were my reason for doing things. They made me feel strong. And now it will just be me. I don't want to do things for me. I have had children at home for 38 years and now they are gone. I also am going to be laid off with the next week. We are just waiting for the axe to fall. Each day is a day of tension. I need my health insurance because I have diabetes, sarcoidosis and high blood pressure. Finacially, because my husband never felt the need to work much, we are going down. We will be going bankrupt and probably lose our home. Our marriage has been spriraling downward anyway. He is hooked on pain killers and adderall. And we are supposed to be Christians?! Everything that is happening is out of my control. I read scripture after scripture, pray and pray. I just cry constantly.
Thank you by: Anonymous
Your article was most helpful and comforting...I felt understood and not alone.
The only thing I would like to add is that you don't have to only be Christian to pray....
Thank You by: Anonymous
Thank you for posting this article. I've been away from God for years, thinking I didn't even need a belief in him (after all, some people seem to do just fine without Him). But recently I've been plagued with thoughts so sinful as to frighten me, and it's seemed to take away my soul. I've been unable to laugh, enjoy music, love my boyfriend, or even get out of bed sometimes. It's caused me to pray again, saying things as simple as "God, please take this away from me". Despite the feelings of utter futility and want of suicide, reading this article helps me to feel that God wants the best for me, and that He doesn't want to leave me in sinful despair. It will be hard, but He may indeed want me to be better. Thank you.
Thanks by: Buzz
first of all am not really good in english, am from Philippines. i have a big problem especially now that what i feel my family dont even have trust in me. we have made arguments last week. and after that my life is feeling heavy that totally hopeless. i am looking for a person who can understand what my situation and can teach or enlight me what to do and talk it in a nice way. encouragement is what am looking to, to fight or overcome all my trials in life. first before the arguments happened am thinking my parents would be able to understand, support, help me to encourage to move on. yes they thinking my future but the way approach or to talk to me as if they dont even trust me. which anger prevail. i have thought that its better i never stay or live with my parents again. coz in times when am downs or troubles they cant able help me. first, here in my country job is very dificult to find if there will be, it is not enough to survive on needs. i know and believed that i made my mistake but what i want now is the support, hope, encourage and a little time to help me to start a new life. now, i have my wife is 3 months pregnant which i need to work hard. yes i am jobless no stable job, just doing some extra sideline income to save for he check up of my wife. my wife has early stage of diabetics which is very risky for the health of my baby in the womb as well my wife. am hoping for a miracle and another chance to live in a good life. am still hope there will be a person who can be able to help me. i found this site in a search engine type the "i am hopeless". well thanks anyway this article it gives me hope to fight on but am still hope for a miracle.
Thank you and more power.
thanks by: Anonymous
I want to thank you for taking the time to write this. I feel so alone tonight even though there are four more people in my house. My life seems hopeless even though I've been a Christrian most my life I just feel like nothing I do matters anymore and the more I try the more I mess up. Thanks for the reminder. I feel beter.
thank you by: Anonymous
I also want to confirm that to journal with God is the ultimate. I forgot about that until you remind me again tonight. I will for sure start journal again, because in a very bad time of my life, it fill my empty life with fullness.
I am HOPELESS tonight, or rather I feel that way. Whenever I start something, business wise or whatever the case might be, I put everything in it, I do the best I can and people are telling me how good I am, but yet NEVER succeed. For 30 years now I tried to make a success of my life, but somehow it does not happen. I am a single mother for almost 20 years and still battling to put bread on the table. I feel hopeless, but I still trust my God, because He promised in His Word, that He will never leave me, nor forsake me. God is my ONLY HOPE!!
For Katharine by: Anonymous
What wonderful words of comfort and hope! Journaling, indeed, does help and it's something I need to do more often; for I find that when I do, I don't feel so down or empty.
Thank you for a wonderful reminder!
journals are great by: karen
I, too have found the help of journals. I also collect words and pictures that inspire me, articles from the internet and sometimes i sit and just read them, I know that they have helped before and will again. My other favorite is too sit and look at nature, a small garden like mine is enough, the beauty of the flowers especially the spring bulbs, so indicative of the feelings of hiding away in darkness only to come up slowly and stretch up towards the heavens...and the snow drop looks so weak,yet it comes through the hard earth and stands so beautifully in the frost...an inspiration to us.... Gods world is ours to rejoice in and share. Karen O
THIS IS TERRIFIC. by: Shirley Peter
The Holy Spirit directed you in writing this. I wish it could get out to many that are suffering in this world. Thank you.
Wonderful! by: Lynn Mosher
Katherine, What a beautiful article. I know it will touch the hearts of many and bring them comfort. Thank you for sharing this. Be blessed.
