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How do you stop the Whining and Complaining? Submit your story.

by Lisa
(Florida)

I have two kids that complain about absolutely everything. Nothing is ever good enough or right enough. Some days I feel like screaming.

It doesn't help that my husband caters to them. He would rather give in than listen to them all the time. So our house is almost always in a state of chaos.

I know other people's kids whine too. There must be something that works to make it stop, but I haven't found it. I would like to hear if something has worked for you.

Comments for
How do you stop the Whining and Complaining? Submit your story.

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its not about you
by: richard

I believe what your children are looking for is leadership. They complain because you let them complain. You can direct them from this selfdestuctive behavior by being the leader that they need to direct them to a succsesfull happy fullfilling life. you tell yourself that you dont want to be a leader but your childrens future depends on it. so be the leader and if your not fake it till you make it. In the long run your kids will love you for it.

Kids want limits
by: Anonymous

I work with children as a psychology student, and you are not alone with this issue. Something that's often helpful is to make sure your kids have clear limits about what they are allowed to have/do (allowance, time watching tv, etc.) and expectations for them (household chores, way they talk to you & your husband). You can tell them these things or even write it down as "household rules".

Although giving in to what they think they want seems like it's making them happy at the time, it just adds to their dissatisfaction later. They don't learn to appreciate what they are allowed to have/do.

It sounds like you and your husband could benefit from communicating more with each other about what you expect from your children. When you two are on the same page, your kids will feel less confused, safer & happier & the whining will decrease. You can do it! Good luck!

Not an expert.
by: Shirley Peter

I am not an expert on how to get anyone to stop complaining except my self. However, whining does start in childhood, and I think that there must be some good way to turn that around.




When my children whined, I got them involved in helping others less unfortunate than themselves. When they complained of being bored, my husband gave them a toothpaste and let them clean out the tub. It worked for them, as they don't whine or complain at all as grown ups and don't remember hearing it much as they were teenagers either.




I think that we do need to teach our children that there are others much worse off than they, and that complaining doesn't help the situation at all. They need to be taught to look for the good in all situations.




God bless you, and let us know if you turn it around.

Whining and Complaining
by: thelma

Hello Lisa,




You haven't said how old your children are, but no matter.




I think showing them some underprivileged children, like at Christmas time, and other times also helps, and being a part of some homeless outreach, where they can see that you care for others, and then also, it becomes a habit, a way of thinking. So when ever they complain about something, without a constructive method to change it, then take something away from them, until they change their complaining.




Also if they are teenagers, their friends can have some negative effect upon them.




Having well to do friends and not being able to be like them, and have what they have, can bring on an unsatisfied attitude.




It all really is about their ages, and then determine how to handle it. Use much prayer.




Good luck, and God bless,




thelma

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