Out of Control Giving?

by Lori
(Mountain Home, Arkansas, USA)

My husband & I are completely on the same page about tithing & do so regularly - no matter what. No problem there. However, while we also both agree we should give of our blessings generously, we seem to disagree about whether we should short-change the household of groceries, needed clothing, etc. so we may also give (charitable contributions, etc.)

We already have a deficit in our monthly budget. We "juggle" each month to make it. We have "down-sized" in every way we can (we have no t.v. services, no gym or other types of memberships, don't eat out but very rarely like on a birthday, etc.) We have sold nearly everything for which we can find a buyer. As we are already living so tightly, I have asked that we refrain from giving (other than tithing) until we have improved our financial situation.

On a regular basis, I am given $20 to $60 for a week of groceries for our family of 4 plus pets. There is no allotment for clothing or other incidentals. I feel in this case there is really no room for any "extra" giving & that if you cannot feed & clothe the family - you have no business offering donations to others. This is where my husband & I disagree.

My son desperately needs a haircut, my daughter has one pair of jeans which we wash constantly (at least when warm weather comes she does have several shorts & skirts), & I am finding myself having to put nearly every drop of gas on a credit card on which we are paying only just a bit more than the minimum. Yet just this last paycheck, he gave donations to 2 different organizations.

God has been very faithful to keep us "afloat". We are not starving (we frequently receive "surprise" gifts of food products and such), but I am very frustrated. I continue to pray about this & do trust God. I would just really appreciate another perspective & perhaps some advice - not to mention prayer support.

Thank you for your patience.

Sisters in Him,
Lori