Restoration in our Marriage

i need prayer in restoring my marriage. my stb ex husband and i are christian people and have been for the past 12 yrs or so. I had a 2 yr affair on my husband of 11 yrs of marriage-we have been together for 14 yrs-I had everything a woman could ask for. i didnt have to work, i stayed at home with our children and did the homemaker thing. and i just had way to much time on my hands and i meet this man online and he was at that point the most perfect man for me. it ran into one lie after another and it was getting out of control i was hurting the ones the meant the most to me. so i ended the affair in the hopes that he would have never found out.and asked god for forgiveness. but in january 2008 he found out the week after i had ended it and he was going to leave me. we talked and he decided to try and make our marriage work. well in may 2008 5 months later, after i thought that maybe this is going to work out and things will be ok, he came to me and said he was going to leave and file for a legal separation. i was crushed. so i granted him what he wanted but not willingly i fought in every aspect but did not succeed. he then comes to me a few weeks after that and says he is filing for a divorce instead. i was crushed even more. i was hoping and praying that if i gave him his space and accepted his decision he would change his mind. well a week or so after that i found out that he might actually be divorcing me for another woman, who was my so called friend at that time, i confided in her for everything and when him and i was having our troubles, i talked to her about that too, confided in her in what i did wrong in our marriage and things he didnt like, and now thats who he is leaving me for. Im madly in love with my husband still and i want him to know this. but i am scared to tell him as i dont want him to pull farther away that what he is already. he is bitter towards me, and i have been so calm, and not gotten angry. i dont want the divorce at all but i was the one that messed up and i have decided to accept his decision, knowing how he feels now. the pain and the hurt. all the images he said he had i have now. i love him so much, that i want him back, i keep praying for gods will in our marriage. and i keep getting the gut feeling that our marriage is not over. could this be god telling me to not give up and to give him his space? to have time to heal? he said he still loves me and cares for me he just cant be married to me, that he wants out. he needs time to think. so thats what im doing, im not giving up on this. i took my ring off but just recently put it back on because i felt this is what God wants me to do. what are your thoughts. and what does god want out of our marriage?? and does god want us to divorce or rebuild our marriage?