Verbally Abusive Husband

by Marian
( Charleston, SC )

Dear Rev.:

My husband and I have been married 43 years. Over 13 years ago, he became impotent due to diabetes. We have three adult children and 5grandchildren. One adult daughter and her son lives with us.

I became a Licensed Bible Teacher in a movement, and he has remained in the Baptist Church, which seems to be an issue with him always comparing his church teachings with mine, as he states that "You all are not the only people who know that stuff."

My prior background was in Business
Administration, but I went back to college when I retired, so I am now learning scholarship subjects in Religious Studies to complement what I already knew about Biblical Teachings and supporting subjects. Now, that has really become an issue with him. In addition to that, our daughter moved in with us, and he always alludes to the "fact" that our daughter knows things and have had experiences that I have not had in life, so in essence, she has a more valid opinion on matters. I tell him there is no way a 32 year-old would know more than a 64 year old, but he yells when I go to speak.

I have told him that, just because he does not know about many academic things, it does not mean that I do not, and in addition, I have worked in Administrative positions, for Attorneys and for a Municipal Government prior to my retirement, whereas, he works in a lower-level supervisory position with a company, but accuses management of always taking advantage of lower level employees. When I try to explain that things are not as they seem from where he seems to be addressing matters, he tells me that he has had more experience than I have had, and that as I worked, people took advantage of me, but I did nothing to prevent it.

Coupled with his impotence, health issues, and his feelings of inferiority, he is almost impossible to live with in harmony.

What do you suggest?